Bereavement, Blog, Business, Depression, Empowerment#, Health, Lifeskills, Mental Health, Personal Development, PTSD, Stillbirth, Wellbeing
“The crunch of feet in time on the gravel slipping away to a gentle swish as feet find grass. The occasional flick of a stone as a foot loses footing or scuffs as they tire. The rhythmical left right, left right; sometimes one speeding, sometimes one slowing but always forming backing into a natural rhythm. Side by side, two determined soldiers march towards what? They don’t know. Just marching on to the future, side by side, step by step, shoulder to shoulder, friend alongside friend. Warrior Women whom no one can now defeat.”
I wrote this after a few days on retreat and it came from the silent walk I went on every morning, side by side with a relative stranger. That relationship in the silence created itself, evolved and became a beacon of strength, oneness and absolute synchronicity in thought and deed. A most powerful experience of sharing time with another person, without word, thought or deed. Just silence and space.
Both on journeys; in different times and with different emotions but from the pain, hurt, realisation, choice, determination to succeed, empowerment and desire to grow and be a better person, came a bond that was almost palpable on those silent excursions.
It clarified for me all I have thought and tried to do with and for others in my life. When you just give space to someone, something will grow and it will be so bold, so courageous, so beautiful and unique that it will shine like a beacon on the darkest winter night for everyone to see, feel and taste in the air as they pass by. Giving space for someone to take a real breath, maybe the first one they have ever really experienced, is so very important. That breath is the first and its a life saver and a life giver. No longer will they exist within the world they have cocooned themselves in, but they will live in a world that they create, over time and with patience, determination and whole lot of the most important ingredient – love.
Silence – the second gift that is given. Talking has its place and is vital to any healing process or growth but sometimes, right at the beginning you just need silence. Silence to think. Silence to argue with yourself. Silence to approve or disapprove of the way you live and act. Silence to really listen to your heart and your head and decide, maybe for the first time ever, which you are going to listen to and go with. Silence to begin. Silence to learn to let go and silence to simply be at one with yourself and the world around you.
For many, me included, this can be a very painful and gut wrenching experience – that moment when you face yourself for the very first time. It can and will, be cleansing but to face yourself and decide what you like, what you don’t, what can stay and what has to leave is massive. It is, if you are doing it with love, honesty and authenticity also the most amazing experience and I guarantee, absolutely life changing. But first to begin….
To begin you have to make choices. To stay where you are or to move forward (even one small step, one brief shuffle is still forward). That may seem an obvious decision and a simple thing to do but, when you are in a deep dark hole and can see no present and no future, only past, it is the biggest, most difficult adventure you will ever choose to go on. But, if you listen to your thoughts and feel with your heart you will know it’s an adventure you cannot afford to miss out on.
Life will change and change is uncomfortable but change is also the very best, most exciting, passionate, emotional experience you will have had, maybe in your whole lifetime. So miss out or not? Choices…. you have them and only you can make them.
Let your adventure write itself but I will get the ball rolling with the ever original “Once upon a time, there was a person whose desire above anything else in the world was to be happy, at peace with themselves and loved…….” you have permission to write the rest – it’s your story…..
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